Rebuilding Trust in a Relationship

Trust is built over time through communication, conversation, and shared experiences. Trust is tested through a variety of circumstances and challenges in even the best of relationships. It’s something that can take a long time to build but can be undone in a moment. Betrayal, disappointment, dishonesty, manipulation can undo a relationship either instantly or over time.

What do you do when you’re in a relationship in which trust has been broken, but you have a desire to rebuild that trust? There are three key ingredients to start rebuilding trust in a relationship after trust has been broken. Repentance. Forgiveness. And Reconciliation. Repentance is the act of turning away from your wrongdoing. It is making a conscious commitment to do things differently from this point forward. Repentance means to change your mind, change your thinking, and literally change your direction. The person who has violated the trust must be willing to repent, acknowledging that what they did broke trust and resolving to change their behavior. Forgiveness is another critical component needed to rebuild trust. The person who has been hurt or offended must be willing to forgive. Forgiving is often the most challenging part of the process. Forgiveness means that you are ready to give up your right to strike back or seek justice. However, forgiveness is one of the first steps that must be taken for true healing and restoration to take place within a relationship. Reconciliation is a mutual commitment of both the person who’s been offended and the person who has done the offense. Both people must be willing to work through challenges and have honest conversations. Both of you must agree to leave what has happened behind you and move forward on a new path in your relationship. That’s reconciliation - to bring things back to an even account.